New year resolutions? A single word to look to for the entire year? How do you celebrate the new year? Often individuals see the new year as an opportunity for a fresh start, a way to welcome the prospect of personal growth and development. With this philosophy in mind let’s see if we can make a diligent effort to normalize a few behaviors and habits in 2023.
Owning Our Mistakes
We need to stop wasting our breath on all the excuses. “He said I should do this and I followed his advice, now look!”, “If she would have done what she was supposed to do then she wouldn’t have made me do this!”, “But look what you did, that’s so much worse!”.
Circumstances in our lives are most definitely out of our control, but what isn’t is how we decide to handle said circumstances. We make our own choices and decisions, and ultimately we are the ones who are responsible. No one can make us do something, we each have free will, and even with a weapon placed at our heads we still have a choice. Each individual is responsible for their free will, their behavior, and control over their body, no one else can EVER make you do something. So in 2023 let’s stop wasting so much time trying to find a scapegoat, projecting instead of internalizing, and simply own any mistakes, learn from them and move on. Once we take responsibility for our own actions, behavior, and decisions we will no longer be bound to the shackles of excuses and ultimately eliminate selfish pride.
Asking for Help
Everyone knows that mom who does it all and who is often referred to as “Wonder Woman” as if she’s earned a badge of honor in motherhood. Here’s the problem with this title, though it’s meant as a compliment, as a job well done, as an assumption that she must be well organized and on top of things, it can also be a prison sentence. Almost as if, she has earned the title and the Wonder Woman crown, and if she were to ask for help now she’d be admitting defeat and her title and reign could suddenly be revoked. What if we flipped the script? What if, instead, when we see a mom asking for help we praise her acknowledgment of knowing she had reached a limit? What if we cheered on the mom who recognizes when she’s pushing herself beyond healthy boundaries? True Wonder Women know their limits, know when others are infringing on their boundaries, know when to say no, and when to ask for help. In 2023 let’s please normalize not just moms asking for help, but anyone and everyone who asks for help. And that’s not to say that you are supposed to be everyone’s saving grace, but you can praise the fact that the individual recognized their need for help and then assist them in finding said help.
Taking a “Reconnect Day”…Like a Mental Health Day but for your Relationship
Far too often life gets in the way! One day you’re young, in love, dying to spend every waking moment together, and then before you know it you have a mountain of responsibilities, obligations, and children enrolled in multiple activities. Suddenly you and your spouse must divide and conquer on the weekends if the household is going to run in an orderly fashion. And you’d like to think that you can play catchup and reconnect some evening during the week but instead, that dinner you planned together had to get bumped because of an out-of-town work commitment. Then it gets bumped again because a close friend is in town. Then before you know it you and your spouse are passing ships in the night and your relationship has dwindled down to roommate status. Thus, just as mental health days have become acceptable and acknowledged as a need in society, reconnect days should be equally as significant. Most employers offer paid time off (and if yours doesn’t it’s worth the sacrifice), schedule a day when you and your partner play hooky from all the obligations and responsibilities of life, and simply reconnect. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant or expensive, it could simply be grabbing coffee and walking in the park. In order for a family to thrive the foundation must be strong and if you do not reconnect on occasion your relationship will drown from the weight of all the obligations, bills, and responsibilities. Schedule your reconnect days now!
What would you add to the list?