funny things kids say – Mom on the go in Holy Toledo

They are right; kids do say the darndest things. While just this morning I found myself laughing out loud at the kiddo’s breakfast table conversations. The topics today were urinals, zombies, and My Little Ponies. Ha-ha! Our 6 year old totally grossed out the girls when he informed them what a urinal was…nothing like taking a bite of your Cheerios then hearing about how your brother pees on everyone else’s pee. Meanwhile our 3 year old was trying to convince our 6 year old that Zombies are so cute and sweet (I am pretty sure she has no idea what Zombies really are…and I am not correcting her). And our poor 8 year old just wanted to have, as she put it, a “normal” conversation. It was one of those mornings where I wish I would have charged the battery on the video camera…who needs Good Morning America when I have quality entertainment in my own kitchen. Ha-ha!

(I am all about finding the humor in the ordinary and keeping it real so I thought I would share a few pictures of a typical day around our house. Please note I have at least attempted to clean. The vacuum is visible. But more important things popped up, like a Ninja, a dancing purple and pink cat, and a princess…just a typical day)

Here are a few additional comments my kiddos made this week that had me laughing out loud.

Background info: My hubby went to a conference over the weekend and was given a lanyard with his name and information on it. He sat it on the dining room table when he got home that night. When our son woke up he requested that he speak with me in private. So we walked into the next room and he said…

“Mom, I don’t want you to get too nervous. Dad is in the CIA. I found his badge”. LOL!

Background info: Our son was acting like he was on his death bed (turned out to be a man/boy cold…ha-ha!) So we went to the doctors. When we pulled up there were two Taxis waiting out front. Upon seeing them my son expressed….

“Wow, they came all the way from New York!!”

I asked, “Why New York?”

“Because that is where all Taxi cabs come from”. LOL!

Background info: I was in the kitchen doing dishes and preparing dinner when my 3 year old came in with a piece of paper with ‘pretend’ writing on it. She looked at me with a very serious expression and declared…

“MOM, this contract doesn’t CUT IT!”

It was so random all I could do was LOL! To which she replied…

“BAD MOMMY!” and walked out of the room. No more Shark Tank for her, ha-ha!

So what have your kiddos said that had you laughing out loud? Does a typical day around your home resemble ours? Did you ever get around to vacuuming this week or did more important things pop up?

Parenthood is demanding, exhausting, amazing, fulfilling, messy, and if you’re lucky from time-to-time you will be graced with some humor. So without further ado, here are a few conversations that I have had over the past week with the kiddos that had me laughing out loud (I am pretty sure that is the first time I actually typed that entire phrase). Lol!

Conversation with our 2^nd grader in the kitchen having an after school snack with her sister…..

2^nd grader: Mom, do you want to hear something funny?

Me: Always!

2^nd grader: It might be a little inappropriate. I just need to warn you of that first. I don’t want you to get in trouble.

Me: Thank you for warning me. That was very considerate of you. I will try not to get myself in trouble with myself!?

2^nd grader: Yep, I am a considerate person. Okay. Mom, say ‘I’ and then spell cup.

Me: I C U P

3 years old: That’s okay. I see you pee all the time mommy.

Meanwhile our 2^nd grader is laughing hysterically and the 3 year old has no idea why that was remotely funny…she sees everyone pee. Haha!

The kiddos and I went to Target to get a gift for a Wedding Shower. We went to print off the registry then planned on making a mad dash to the restrooms…that Starbucks Venti Green Tea might have been a bad idea!

Kindergartener: Mom can I do the computer?

3 year old: I can do it! She exclaimed while hitting random keys

2^nd grader: Mom I know how to do this.

Me: It is Max’s turn.

Kindergartener: what do I do?

Me: Start by hitting any key.

Kindergartener/Max looks frantically up and down the keyboard.

Me: Just hit any key! (Now crossing my legs)

Kindergartener: I can’t find it.

2^nd grader: Just hit any of them.

Kindergartener: I can’t find any!

2^nd grader: Just hit any of the keys. There is no any key.

Kindergartener/Max: If there is no any key why do they want me to hit it? He declared with much frustration.

Me: Lol! I have to pee. Let’s pee then we will find that darn any key.

She did NOT just say that!!!……….

While dining at a local establishment I took our youngest to the restroom 3 times (is it sad that that seems normal? haha!). By our 3rd visit I had to go too. So I went. And while I was going she yelled, loud enough for the entire restaurant to hear, “Mom you have a BIG butt!” Lol! I could hear the woman in the next stall trying to contain her laughter. Haha!

What has your little one said that had you lol?